All I Want for Christmas Is You
by LoveLaughLive13
Summary: Good girl Amy Juergens is back from England after college, on Christmas Eve. In her hometown, she see's her ex-boyfriend, Ricky Underwood; the always and forever bad boy. They could use a Christmas miracle. The desire and want remains but so does the pain. Can they mend the wounds between them or will this holiday season pass them by? One-shot.


_Hey guys! _

_I hope you all had an amazing holiday._

_I know this is late, as Christmas is long gone. But Fan Fiction was deleting my work and giving me problems with uploading my work._

_Still ... I hope you enjoy this festive one - shot!_

_See you at the bottom!_

**_Disclaimer: Secret Life isn't mine, but the plot is!_**

* * *

**All I Want for Christmas Is You** **  
**

_**Do not look for love, l**__**et love find you.**_

_**That is why it is called falling in love. **_

_**You don't force yourself to fall. **_

_**You just fall.**_

I trudged my suitcases into the cab. The honking noises outside and the rude flight attendants I had encountered, reminded me why I had chosen to go to college in London. I had been lucky enough to get out of Valley Glen and start my education in the _University of Greenwich School of Law_. Now, after finishing college and coming back on Christmas Eve ... it felt ... unnerving. It wasn't that I didn't like Valley Glen.

Because I did ... to an extent.

This place was a home to my childhood and my family. My most special and loved memories were a part of this town. The town were I had grown up. It was the only home I had ever known, especially since I had gone to college in a foreign country like England. There wasn't anyone in this town, whom I couldn't turn to if I had problems, because at some point everyone knew the problems. That was the problem.

The thing about small towns was that everyone was all up in everybody's business.

_se·cret_

_ˈsēkrit_

adjective

_**1**. __not known or seen or not meant to be known or seen by others._

_"How did you guess I had a secret plan?"_

_confidential, top secret, classified, undisclosed, unknown, private, under wraps_

noun

_**1**. __something that is kept or meant to be kept unknown or unseen by others._

_"A state secret."_

_synonyms: confidential matter, private affair_

Secret.

It was a word that was not in the vocabulary of this town. There were more people who gossiped then there were people who didn't. People that could build a country out of a little village. It was the thing I hated about living a small town. I had only managed to keep one secret ... that ended up destroying everything and compelled me to go to a college thousands of millions away instead of a small distance from home. Only one name came to mind when I remembered this secret and the damage it had caused.

Ricky Underwood.

When I had gone to Grant High School, I had met him. I still remember the moment I had come into contact with him, even though the lines were a bit blurred. The lines were always blurred between us. The line between love and hate and between lust and hate.

It would always be like that.

.

.

.

_I shoved all my text books back into the crappy lockers they had at Grant High School. It was my junior year and I couldn't wait to leave this high school and move on with my life. With a frustrated sigh, I looked around the crowded and buzzing hallway to find my best friend Adrian. We were one of the lucky ones that ended up going to the same high school. Our friendship from middle school had stayed. But, even if we didn't end up going to the same high school, we would have still found a way to keep in contact with each other._

_We were just like that._

_I looked around, feeling annoyed. Suddenly, all the hairs on my neck stood on edge._

_Someone was behind me._

_Before, I could turn around and see for myself who this stalker person was and hand their ass over to them, a warm hand down on my shoulder and spun me around. I grabbed the collar of that person's shirt to steady myself from being spun at such a speed._

_"Who the fuck ..." I snapped in annoyance._

_I looked up and the intensity in those hauntingly beautiful brown eyes took me back for a second. He smirked at me as though he was the inventor of that wicked grin that looked sinful on him. The amused glint in his eyes was on display._

_He was really, fucking hot ... correction ... he was sex personified._

_"Amy Jeurgens, right?" He asked. My insides melted at hearing his raspy and velvety, delicious voice. I snapped myself out of it, before I did something really stupid like jump on him or hump his leg or something in the hallway._

_"What's it to you?" I snapped, flicking a strand of my hair back. His smirk grew wider and his gaze traveled over me in an erotic way, leaving a trail of white, hot heat in it's place. Suddenly, the dark wash and ripped skinny jeans and a simple coral fitted V-neck shirt made me feel extremely hot. Was the tempreture rising, or is it just me?_

_"Hey! Eyes up here!" I snapped my fingers, surprised my voice was still stable._

_"I'm Ricky Underwood." He grinned, his eyes slowly traveling up my body and to my face._

_"And I don't give a shit." I smiled, a fake and shitty smile and turned around. Guys like him screamed disaster and trouble. I didn't need any of that especially with the crap I was going through with my parents and Jimmy. I would dump him but my parents didn't want me too. They said he was an exceptional and intelligent guy and I would disappoint all of them if I made a stupid decision as to break up with him._

_He was also boring as fuck._

_Adrian would die laughing when I told her about the times we had sex. I would always have to fake my orgasm, while he would fish around with his stub and try to find my G-spot. It was degrading, really. He was actually a sweet guy ... which made it that much harder to dump him. The whole flowers for every date and chaste kisses in a gentlemanly fashion. The whole nine yards. What every girl wants in a guy._

_But, not me._

_I don;t have the slightest clue about what I want._

_I was walking down the hallway trying to find Adrian and compare schedules before the damn bell rang. Then, I felt a hand on my waist, spin me around again and back me up against the metal lockers. I clenched my eyes as the heat coming off Ricky was providing me way to much pleasure._

_I opened my eyes to find his dark brown ones. It was so hard to not get lost in them._

_"Listen, motherfucker ... unlike some people, I need to get to class." I hissed at him trying to ignore the delicious feeling of his masculine body being a heartbeat away from mine. He gave me a wicked grin and this glint in his fascinating eyes told me he was enjoying this way more than I was._

_"Touche." He chuckled. The sound was husky and brilliant._

_I rolled my eyes._

_"Listen, when you get tired of your fruit cup of a boyfriend, come find me." He winked. _

_How did he know about me and Jimmy?_

_Then he did the unthinkable. He took a piece of paper out of his pocket, with his number written on it. He moved closer. He was so close ... I could kiss him. He could kiss me. But, he didn't. He opened the first few buttons on my V-neck and shirt and slipped the paper inside the middle of my chest. I bit my lip, as I tried to keep the moan inside. His fingers felt fantastic on my skin. My heart sped up and my blood coursed through my veins._

_Then, the fucking bell rang._

_He was gone before I knew it._

_I fished the paper out of my bra and looked at his number. For some reason, I couldn't stop the idiotic smile that spread across my face._

_Algebra._

_Biology._

_Literacy._

_History._

_The bell for lunch rang and I couldn't help the frustration that built inside of me because I couldn't find him. I walked down the empty and desolate hallways and the echo of my flats was the only sound to be heard. I had a difficult time concentrating in class as the only thought that surrounded my mind was him._

_Then, a heard a creak of a door and my head jerked to where the sound had come from. Before I could object, Ricky had grabbed my arm and pulled me into the ... Janitor's Closet. My heart sped up at the sight of him again._

_"Looking for me?" He cocked an arrogant eye brow. Before, I could give him a smart ass reply, my back was against the tiled wall and his lips were on mine. __Warm and soft yet hard and rough. Without hesitating, my fingers knotted in his hair and his hands wrapped themselves around my waist._

_We made out the whole lunch period. I'm pretty sure it would have escalated if the freakin' bell hadn't rang, signaling our departure. I had looked all rumpled, since my clothes were wrinkled and my hair was messy._

_But I wouldn't have had it any other way. _

.

.

.

He was rugged and _all_ man. Much too mature from all the juvenile boys I was surrounded by in high school. Our relationship was different. We didn't have the cheesy cheer leader and quarter back relationship. I was the girl that followed all the rules. He was the boy that didn't have rules. I didn't know how we had clicked ... we just did. Nothing between us was ever simple or easy.

But it was worth it.

All the madness, all the fights and then the steamy make up sessions. I would repeat them all in a heartbeat, even knowing that we would end up like this. Millions of miles apart, when we could be in each other's arms.

And it still hurt to think about it.

About what we _had_.

Now, knowing that I was in Valley Glen ... that he wasn't a whole ocean away from me ... it made my insides tingle with false hope. He had probably found someone else. A girl who wasn't complicated or confusing. They were probably deeply in love and living together, while they went to college ...

It physically hurt me to think about it.

He had ended up cracking all my walls. He was the only guy who ever saw the girl I hid from society. I was only inhibited and care free when I was with him. I still thought about it, even after it had been this long.

Why are we the way we are today?

Where had we gone wrong?

Where had _I_ gone wrong?

.

.

.

"Amy! Oh my God, Amy! You are back!" My best friend Adrian jumped on me when I entered my parent's house. My parents where standing around the kitchen counter, with tight and forced smiles, framing their faces. Their forced and fake love made me want to throw up.

It was never like that between me and Ricky.

We may not have been perfect ... but we were _real_.

"I missed you so fucking much!" She squealed and pulled in for another hug. The look my parents had on their faces me want to laugh. I knew Adrian did that on purpose, to annoy my parents. It was one of the things I loved about her. They never really liked her. They never really liked anyone, when I actually thought about it. They were too self absorbed to do so. To caught up in their own wishes and wants to ever be able to care about some one else.

Even their own daughter.

"I'm ... going to ... choke!" I said between gasps, while Adrian almost squeezed the life out of me.

"Yeah, yeah. There is going to be a little holiday party at Grace's house. It's kind of like a holiday and engagement party! We _have_ to go!" Adrian said, while letting me go. I knew parties were going to be lining up when I got home. I wasn't much of a party girl but Adrian had made promise that I would come with her when I got back.

"We will, I promise." It was hard not to smile at her enthusiasm.

I looked over my shoulder at my approaching parents and their tight smiles. After their uncomfortable hugs, they gave me a stern look. "Don't stay out too late ..." I knew they wanted to say more, but I didn't let them. I was tired of their bull shit about following some crappy rules.

"You can't tell me what to do now." I said, savoring the look of pride I got from Adrian.

.

.

.

"I'm so happy that you are not staying with Anne and George." Adrian said, talking about my parents. We were in the condo, she shared with Omar before they had broken up. She lived alone, and had offered to let me stay with her, until I found a place ... an offer I had gladly accepted.

Anywhere but my parent's house.

"So am I." I said, walking down the hallway and into the room she was lending me.

"Girl, you can stay here forever! I already love having you here! Besides, you have to make up for the six years, you weren't here." She said. I laughed, whole heartedly. I then realized, how much I had missed being with Adrian.

We weren't best friends.

We were _more_ than that.

Words couldn't describe our bond.

"Tell me that, when you start to get tired of me." I said, entering the empty room. There was a made bed, a dresser, a closet and a vanity. I knew Adrian didn't have this when her and Omar had the condo. I gave her a look. I had told her not to spend money on me.

"What?! I couldn't help it! Just wait until you see your real Christmas Present!" She said, happily. I smiled. It was almost impossible not to when you were surrounded by her love, smiles and care. It made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

"Hurry and unpack! We have a party to attend!" She said, excited as she practically skipped down the hallway and into her room.

.

.

.

"You are_ not_ wearing that!" Adrian, said with a disgusted expression on her face. She was talking about the old jeans and green sweater I was wearing. I rolled my eyes. It wasn't super fashionable but it was not hideous either.

Okay ... maybe it was.

But, I didn't bring any holiday dresses with me. It wasn't even like I owned anything presentable to wear.

"I will lend you something ... but I will not let my best friend look like that!" She said, running into her room, to find me something _decent_ enough to where, based on her standards. I sighed ... I didn't really feel like dressing up tonight.

Or going out.

Being back in Valley Glen, I was bombarded with thoughts of Ricky. Everywhere I went ... everything I saw, reminded me of him. The Dairy Shack, where we had our first real date and where he had punched our waiter because he checked me out and flirted with me multiple times. Every thing, brought back memories of him. I felt as pathetic and depressed as I was. I didn't feel like the Christmas Spirit was surrounding me.

It was sad, really.

"Here!" Adrian came back carrying some clothing in her hand. "Wear this! No complaints!" She said, sternly, throwing the dress at me. I rolled my eyes, trying to look annoyed but I couldn't help and smile anyway.

"We have to get you to look presentable. We don't have much time left! Hurry!" Adrian squealed. She was already in a burgundy Jack Wills Laindon dress. Her hair was straight and she had on some killer Jimmy Choo Lottie Black Suede heels. With some gorgeous makeup and a beautiful Chanel '97 Collectors Mini Clutch she looked gorgeous and put together. She always was. Even her most jumbled and random thoughts seemed to organized.

I quickly slipped on the dress. Truth be told ... it was gorgeous.

A one of a kind black Adara, off the shoulder and laced bandage dress. Adrian also gave me a pair of her Michael Kors Leighton Platform heels. I quickly curled my hair, using a curling wand and styled it in a half up and half down holiday hair do, using the help of Adrian and millions of bobby pins.

I painted some bright gold eyeshadow, a red lipstick and the help of eyeliner, mascara, bronzer and all that jazz on my face.

The outcome wasn't terrible.

"You look gorgeous!" Adrian said, squealing after spritzing some of her Victoria's Secret_ Amber Romance_ body spray on me. It felt good to look nice and be complimented. But the only time I ever really _felt_ gorgeous was when Ricky's heated gaze traveled over me in the most erotic way.

I felt desired when he looked at me like that.

Wanted.

Beautiful.

I knew I missed him. Everything about him. The way he looked at me, the way he smelled ... I used to get high of his delicious scent. But, now wasn't the time to remember him. Me and Adrian had party to attend ...

Suddenly, a haunting thought crossed my mind.

"Adrian?" I asked, my voice shaky and uncertain.

"Yes?" Adrian answered, checking herself out in the floor length mirror by her door.

"Is Ricky going to be at the party?" I asked, the question by insides twisting in anxiety. I fiddled around with my WTF Clutch. Adrian stopped messing around with her hair and slowly turned around an intense look on her face.

"Maybe."

Was it more weird that one part of me wanted him to show up while the other part of me didn't? Or that there was this foreign part of me that was just plain confused?

"Lets go." Adrian said, stepping towards the door.

I took a deep breath. I hoped everything would work out, no matter what happened.

.

.

.

I rang the doorbell to Grace's house, after me and Adrian had gotten out of her car. The cream color of the buildings glowed in the luminous twinkling of the stars.

Was it always this huge?

"Hi guys! Amy! You are back!" Grace said, while giving me a hug and ushering me and Adrian inside. The whole place was buzzing with chatter as the holiday lights and music surrounded everyone. The smell of booze and candy canes was thick in the air.

I just wanted to be home.

But, I had promised Adrian that I would come with her to any holiday party that we were invited to. If there were specific types of people I couldn't stand were people who couldn't keep the promises that they made.

Then, why did Ricky keep crossing my thoughts?

After all the promises he had broke ... promises of forevers and a lifetime of happiness, with him. The sweet words of affection he had spoken and the reassuring and promising kisses ... they kept haunting me. Especially, now that I was back in Valley Glen. Why did I keep letting him enter my mind and swallow my thoughts? I should regret being with him, allowing myself to love him the way I did ...

Instead, I let him consume every thought, every part of me ... even after all these years.

"Have some alcohol girl!" Adrian handed me a wine glass, filled with what seemed to be red wine.

If I was to have alcohol ... I would need something _way_ stronger than that.

Noticing my hesitation, Adrian rolled her eyes. "Loosen up! It is Christmas Eve! Enjoy it and have some fun!" She had always been the reckless, party girl in our friendship. She wasn't that much of a crazy party-er but ... if life ever gave her lemons, she would do Tequila shots.

I grabbed the wine glass and washed it down my throat, reveling in the fuzzy and burning sensation in the pit of my stomach.

The feeling was prominent in my second glass.

Third glass.

Fourth glass.

But it became kind of blurred by my fifth glass.

Semi sober, I walked around Grace's house. Every one was partying and having a good time. I got greetings and wishes of a Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays from people I could barely even recognize, since puberty had done wonders to all my child hood friends.

Boobless Bethany was now sporting some watermelons inside her red sweater dress to match her bright, fire engine red lip stick.

Steve the Stick, had a broad chest to match with his sandy hair, and worked as a model for Hollister now.

At one point, I felt the intense gaze of someone on me. I shrugged it off, knowing I had just come back from England ... people were going to look. It could be anyone. I bumped into someone, after loosing my balance on the silly heels I was made to wear but a certain eccentric Latina chick.

"Jimmy?" I questioned, taking in the dark curls and bright smile of the boy I dated throughout high school ... until I had met Ricky.

"The one and only." His smile was so big, I touched his jaw, to make sure it was real.

The things you do when you aren't really sober.

"Amy Jeurgens ... back from college! How is everything going?" He asked, running a hand through his hair. Was that a blush staining his cheeks?

"So far so good. How have things been here?" I questioned, trying to make simple and civil conversation and trying to shake of the unnerving feeling that I was being watched. I looked around the room, self consciously.

"Pretty good. Everyone had been talking about your return." He said sheepishly. The music in the back round changed quickly from enthusiastic and merry to soft and romantic. "Would you like to dance?" Jimmy asked holding his hand out.

"Sure." It wouldn't hurt.

His hands were placed in a gentlemanly manner on the small of my back and I placed my hands on his shoulders. I swayed with him, the silence becoming too silent to ignore. It wasn't awkward but it wasn't like how remembered talking to Jimmy.

He pulled me closer and I smiled at his little attempts at flirting. I didn't want to lead him on but I didn't want to be a rude little bitch either.

_Last Christmas I gave you my heart,_

_But the very next day,_

_You gave it away._

_This year, to save me from tears,_

_I'll give it to someone, _

_I'll give it to someone special._

The time passed by sickeningly slow.

Dance after dance and tasteless words were exchanged with Jimmy. With every step I was more closer to him than I preferred to be. With every step, his lips seemed to be to near ... his presence seemed to be to close ... and I still couldn't shake off the feeling that I was being watched.

Jimmy seemed to be all up in my space now. His lips were right there and I just wanted to pull away. I knew coming here was a bad idea. Jimmy was the kind of sweet guy who never got the hint unless you broke it to him, super harshly. Then he would make it look like you were the bad guy and he had done nothing wrong except for being carried away a little. That was one thing that annoyed the fuck out of me about him.

He was leaning in, his eyes drooping shut.

Then I felt a familiar touch on my fore arm.

I jerked my head around, catching Jimmy off guard.

It was _him_.

.

.

.

He was just like how I remembered him and then some.

His tame less black sex hair, his deep chocolate eyes that seemed to look right through me and his pink and pouty lips that were now pursed into a thin and angry line. His hand was boring through my skin and making my blood course.

Jimmy was lost and scratching his neck, looking at me questioningly. I was at a loss for words.

"I think that is enough, don't you?" His deep and velvety voice. It still melted my insides and me tingle in anticipation.

"Actually, you just interrupted our dance." Jimmy said in a shaky voice, putting on a brave set of balls. He placed his hands on my waist and pulled me in his direction. Ricky cocked an eyebrow and smirked at the nerve of this guy. But his anger was shown through his dilating eyes. He chuckled and walked towards Jimmy.

"Listen, motherfucker ... you do not fucking touch her agian. You do ... I'll rip your am from it's socket. Don't even look at her." Ricky seethed at him. I felt the anger boiling inside of me. Who the fuck did he think he was coming up to me after all these years and breaking up the dance with me and my ex-boyfriend.

"Who the fuck do you think you are?" I snapped at him and he turned his eyes to me, a slow smirk spreading across his face.

"I'll just ... I'll go." Jimmy swallowed and walked away. He didn't need to be told twice by Ricky.

Great.

Just great.

I glared at him and walked away. I didn't need to face him right now. Not after all these years. What would I do? What would I say? This wasn't necessary right now. I looked around Grace's house and found a stair case. I walked up slowly, trying not to fall flat on my face.

The second floor was much more quiet, although the pounding music from downstairs could still be heard. I leaned back against the wall, of the dimly lit hallway. I tried to relax and calm my nerves by breathing in and out slowly.

_Inhale ..._

_Exhale ..._

_Inhale ..._

_Exhale ... _

"Trying to hide from me." I jumped in shock and opened my eyes to see Ricky right in front of me. I hadn't even heard him. His eyes traveled down me in a way the lit the spark inside me, that I had thought was long burnt out. Goosebumps spread out, all over my skin.

"I have no reason to hide from you." I retorted, re-opening my eyes.

"Then, why are you?" He asked.

"Why did you drive Jimmy away? Answer mine and I'll _try_ to answer your questions." I threw him my own questions. His mouth pressed into a thin and cold line.

"He was touching you." His voice was a low growl and it made my pussy purr, in need for him. His fists clenched and unclenched in his obvious anger. As sexy and magnificent he looked ... he had no right to be angry like this. "He can't touch or look at you like that. Only I am allowed to do that. Your mine, Amy. The boy needed to learn that."

"I'm not yours, Ricky!" I said, trying to convince myself too.

"Yeah, you are. Don't you _dare_ deny it. Your body knows it even if you don't." he said in a deep and velvety voice, walking closer to me. The warmth radiating from his body was deliciously overwhelming. He was right. Even after all this time, he still had all this control over my body.

"Stop." I whispered.

"Amy ..." He began but I didn't let him.

It wasn't fair.

"No. You walked out on me. You can't just come find me at a party, ages later and still call me yours! I'm not your chew toy!" Tears were threatening to spill, but I blinked them back trying to compose myself before I did something very irrational. He walked out on me ... and as easy as it was to fall back into his arms and welcome everything from his dark brooding looks to his sensitive emotions ... I couldn't.

"But now you are back ... and ... wait ... is it because you have _someone_ waiting for you back in England?" The way he said, someone, made it clear who he was talking about in general. His eyes narrowed and his jaw clenched.

I swallowed thickly.

I had no reason to make him feel comfortable. "Not really ... but I haven't been hiding from other men, either." I glared right back at him.

"I'll kill them. If they touched you ... goddammit ... it nearly rips me apart to think of someone's hands ..." His voice took on a quiet and dangerous tone. It made my insides flutter to see that he didn't want me with other men.

Maybe he still ... cared.

Or maybe he didn't, I thought as a daunting thought took over my mind.

"Oh, please ... don't act like you haven't been with anyone, while I was gone." I rolled my eyes. He was _Ricky Underwood_ ... women flocked to him like how white girls flocked to Starbucks. He was bound to have gotten his dick wet.

The thought made my blood run cold.

Him ... with another women ... it felt like all the air had been released from my body and the profound jealousy I was feeling.

"When you left ... it was like you took a part of me with you. For a few months all I tried to do was get you out my head. I fucked around ... like I did before I met _you_. God, I would have done anything to stop you from boarding that plane if I knew. I didn't leave my apartment for days and I just ... I missed you so much." The desperation and agony in his voice killed me. It felt difficult to breathe knowing I had caused him this much pain.

"But you walked out on me." My voice sounded as small and weak as it felt ... my body just physically ached.

"You deserved better. Everyone had figured out about us. People were talking and I did the one thing I regret to this day. I was a a motherfucking coward. You scared me. The things I felt for you scared me. What was happening around us fucking terrified me. I did the only thing I knew how to ... I ran away." His words were so raw, they made me weep with desire. His intense and heated gaze traveled over my face like he was seeing me for the first time.

"Ricky ..."

"No ... let me finish. God knows, your such a pain in the ass, self righteous, bitchy ..." He said, but I stopped him. What the fuck? Pain in the ass, self righteous, bitchy! I glared at him opened my mouth to counter him, but he pressed closer to me, his body flush against mine making me loose my train of thought.

"You are all of that ... dammit if I don't want every single fucking part of you." He said.

.

.

.

My back hit the wall as Ricky shut the door. His lips were on mine agian before I could stop him. He lips were just like how I remembered but even better. He tasted like raspberries and alcohol and the things his tongue did to me, made me want to melt. I ran my fingers into his hair and pulled and tugged, eliciting deep groans from his mouth. His hands were wrapped around me and his fingers were digging into my hips.

My moan was muffled as Ricky bit my lip ... hard ... my his tongue.

He pulled apart, when the need for air became too much. His hand moved to push aside my hair as his lips found the sensitive skin on my neck. He licked the pot behind my ear and I couldn't help the freakish moans that were escaping my mouth.

I had no idea whose room this was ... and at this point I couldn't give a shit.

He pulled away to remove his blazer from his body. I grabbed the collar on his dress shirt and pulled sending buttons flying everywhere. Ricky looked up at me and bit his bottom lip, making me want to hump his leg.

"That was so fucking hot." He said, before ripping the rest of his shirt off.

I pressed my lips back to his and moaned into his mouth as his tongue pushed it's way into my mouth, in the hottest fucking way _ever_.

"This dress, as hot as it is ... it needs to go." He said. I pulled up from my knees and up above my head and almost melted at the look he was giving me. His eyes traveled over me in that same erotic way that always seemed like the first. I pulled my uncomfortable heels off and threw them into the unknown room.

He pushed me back against the wall, his lips finding my neck. He sucked and licked and bit enough to leave a mark. His hands found my underwear and he ripped it the pleasurable burn, making me hiss.

His thumb pressed against my clit and I moaned loudly. I could almost feel his smirk, as his fingers ran up and and down, lathering themselves in the moisture that resided there. The sounds coming from my mouth didn't sound like me but I was too far gone to care.

"Ricky!" I yelled, as his finger slipped inside me, past the knuckle. My hands were gripping his broad shoulders holding on for dear life.

He teasingly moved his finger in and out slowly, and I groaned. His finger was out before I could object and his hands tore my bra off from my body. The tearing of fabric was heard. I tried to glare at him through my haze of lust.

"Hey! That was my Victoria's Secret ..."

He interrupted me. "I don't give a fuck. You don't need that shit when you are with me anyway." He growled and his mouth was on my hard nipple before I could object. My hands went to his hair as his hand went to my other breast and squeezed and pinched.

"Ricky! Oh, fuck ... shit, shit! Oh, God!" I yelled. The stuff he was doing to me with his hands and mouth should be illegal. He let my nipple go with a _pop_ sound and blew air on it, making it painfully stiff and chilled.

His mouth found mine again and he gave me a kiss that made my toes curl. Tongue, teeth and everything in between. His mouth moved with mine ravenous and hurried, as if he was going to loose me. He pulled back and looked me deep in the eyes. And he kissed me again, while undoing his fly and dropping his pants

And I lost myself to him.

Every.

Single.

Fucking.

Part.

He was all I ever wanted. He is all I will ever want. I will always and forever _love_ the man who tried to push me away and bring me back. The man who was smirking at me through his intoxicating haze of lust. The man who didn't know I was still hopelessly in love him. Always had been. I didn't need to tell him and have him runaway like last time. But, my brain couldn't administer that fact.

"God, Ricky, I love you." My whisper could be heard everywhere and the emotion of those words echoed throughout the room.

_God, I'm such a fuck up!_

_Right after we meet ... I make want to to runaway again!_

He pressed himself towards me, my breasts hurt and his erection pulsed against my pussy in the most delicious way. I groan and lean my head against the wall, my eyes fluttering shut. I opened my eyes again to find him staring at me intensely, the heat in his eyes making me throb.

"I'm so sorry ..."

"Did you mean it?" He asked.

"Wha - wait? What did you say?" I questioned my voice small.

"Did you mean it?" He asked again. He sounded unsure of himself and this shocked me beyond measure.

"Of, course, Ricky. I ... I love you. I didn't say it so you would have to say it back again." I said, assuring him and trying to ease the worry etched on his beautiful features.

"Say ... say it again." He says, his voice deeper and huskier.

"I love y - " I can barely finish my word before his lips on mine again. Hard and persistent, not backing down without a fight. He grans my hips and crushes me too him and I can feel his abs and masculinity on my bare skin. Everything is so perfect like this.

I love it.

I love _him_.

All of him. His deep and dark past and all the dangerous little parts of him. He can't hide from me. I accept him fully and and love him with my whole heart. There is always this shit on Tumblr or some Hallmark cards that describe love.

It's impossible.

You can't describe it. It _consumes_ you. All of you.

His boxers are gone and I can see why, girls flock to him. Some people have big dicks ... but this ... Ricky,he was blesses. I touch it, hurried and wanting. Aching for him and heath. His hunger and fire. My pulse raced and my whole just _throbbed_.

A wicked grin spread across his face at noticing my reaction. I rolled my eyes, acting nonchalant. His tip pushed against my throbbing entrance teasingly. All playfulness was completely gone from his body. It was replaced with a desire that burned and fizzled between the two of us. I didn't care about anything except the ache that needed to be satisfied.

"This is mine." He seethed, his tip pushing in and out me, making me want to rip my hair out in frustration.

"Say it." He hissed, his lips at my neck, sucking and biting.

"God ... Ricky it's yours, I'm yours. God, I need you." I sighed. I needed him so badly, the desperation was overwhelming.

"Tell me." He said, his lips at my breasts, licking at the swells.

"I want you."

"Say _it_."

"I love you."

He slammed into me with such force, my scream sounded unrecognizable.

The sound of our skin meeting was the best symphony I had ever heard. I clutched his shoulders, holding on for dear life as he pounded into me, with deep and powerful strokes. I knew that I would be sore tomorrow but it was worth it.

"Oh, God! Ricky! Fuck! Don't stop, please ... unghh!" He hit that spot inside me every single time.

"Fuck! So tight. Shit!" He thrust harder, increasing his pace, making my insides clench.

_I was going to cum ..._

He slammed into me over and over again, tiring my body out, tiring my body out but still leaving me wanting more. My insides clenched and I gripped his hair knowing I was going to cum. The pleasure rolled through my body in an intense wave, leaving my vision black.

"Ricky!" I screamed as my orgasm rocked through my body.

"Fuck! Amy!" He groaned as the hot jets of his release hit my my upper thighs and lower abdomen, making me arch my back. God, he was beautiful when he came. Who am I kidding? He was always beautiful.

"God, Amy I love you." He groaned. My eyes widened, as I slowly came down from my high.

"Really?"

"Yeah. I love you. I was an idiot for not realizing that before, when this whole town knew about us and turned on us. I should have stayed by your side but I only ran away wile simultaneously getting closer." He said, his hands caressing my face.

"I ... I love you too, Ricky. I always have."

.

.

.

The sun peeked through the windows that weren't mine. I was snuggled with Ricky, my head tucked neatly under his rough chin and my arms on his chest. His hands were wrapped tightly around my waist and we were on a bed that wasn't ours.

We could worry about that later.

It was Christmas!

I twisted in the bed and Ricky stirred, pulling me against him tighter.

"I love you." He whispered. He still made me giggle like a little school girl.

"I love you too." I said, tracing the curves of his lips. He opened his eyes and smirked.

"What about a morning kiss?" He asked.

"But there isn't a mistletoe." I teased him.

"Fuck that." He growled pressing his lips to mine, firm and fiery.

"Merry Christmas, Amy." He said in between kisses.

"Merry Christmas Ricky."

* * *

_I hope you enjoyed reading that as much as I loved writing that!_

_Review please, as a belated Christmas gift!_

_Thank you for your support and love!_

_MWAH!_

**_Write down you New Year's resolutions in the review bar below because I would love to see them! _**

_Have a safe and awesome new year's and I will see you in 2014!_

_I love you bitches!_


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